When goals take over

Sometimes I wonder if this is what I wanted.

Is this what comes with being goal oriented? Sleepless nights wondering if i'll ever get anywhere? Get to the place that I need to be?

I have so many places...so many ideas that I want to pursue. Who am I anyways?

What do I want? I want to be happy. I want to be succesful... but how do I get there?

I want to write forever, I want to love and live and smile and laugh

I know what I want, it just takes time.

I see people get discouraged over tiny failures...wait for what's to come.

One's true character is determined by what he or she does in those instances when everything seems to fail. Sometimes I just want to curl up in my bed and not wake up until everything is okay again. Sometimes I just want to fast forward in time to a place where I want to be.

But we have to know that not everything is going to be rainbows and sunshine all the time. We have to know that without the darkness we would never see light. Without the storm there is no calm.

So I guess i'm in the middle of the storm.

But no way am I giving up. I have everything I need to accomplish everything i've ever wanted.

It's just so tempting to give up everything and go party all night...but why?

Why do people waste their lives doing such unethical things when they know that in the long run nothing will be okay? It's okay to live in the moment sure... I know what that's like. But also one has to think about the future... the goals. Am I the only one who thinks about these things now?

Everyone tells me there is time.... but the truth is:

There is no time. There is time to see the light, the smiles, to laugh

but there is no time to sit back and do absolutely nothing because one day we are all going to have no reason to wake up in the morning.

How about that?

That's what i'm scared of. That one day i'll just give up.

But I know I won't. I'm going to keep on going. I'm going to be where I want to be very soon.