Dear muffin,
You knew it. I knew it.
I question myself even thinking about you. Why can't you get out of my head?
I'm surrounded my all of these others and it just makes me realize how much they don't have. How much they lack in the sense that I can be truly happy with only one person and that was you. Such a beautiful person you are, it's an incomparable feeling thinking... believing that I really lost you. I've sat and i've laughed, i've wondered, i've enjoyed, i've cried, and i've thought some more. Sometimes my thoughts get me into trouble. You claim that I doubted you. that I never gave it a real chance. I gave you everything, all I had. You were my everything.
It's hard to take my heart and give it to someone else. I'll never do it. I just can't. You had a way of appreciating the smallest things in the world. Such simplcity could just brighten up your face when you noticed something new about me or something. I don't even know why i'm writing this i've just been thinking a whole lot about you. being with other guys... it makes me want to scream. It makes me want to hit something. I hear people talking about love... and I just think "they dont know a thing about love."
we had love. you're right. I freaked out.
But honestly, sometimes people need a break from everything. Sometimes it's okay to move on for a little while, do you for a little while. Sometimes its okay to break way and do your own thing. When you let something go and it comes back to you it was yours all along. You never understood that I meant well and the only way to do that was to hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you for a second. You have to understand that I did what I had to do on a quest for something out of the ordinary. I'm happy now and I hope more than anything that you're happy too. What am I saying? I know you're happy. (:
You probably don't want to talk to me... I understand. But i'll be here whenever you decide that you do. Just remember that i'll always love you.
-caterpillar
